Lee Reynolds: the late Gus Wood's Birthday

On June 5, Gus Wood would be 70.  I liked Gus. To me, he was fun to be around.  He had a colorful personality and, off and on through the years, I've heard a number of funny Gus Wood stories, some of which he may have initated himself.   Gus was witty and self-deprecating. He joked that, when he was younger, he was so skinny he had to jump around in the shower to get wet and that he could side-step through the strings of a harp without striking a note.  He claimed kinship with Miss Smallwood who, he said, referred to him as the 'small Wood boy."   Gus loved the role of a mischievous scoundrel. At a noon meal at the Rathskeller on Cherry street, Gus once dared anyone at the table to prove that he did not  pay a more studious class member $200 to take his comprehensive exams for him. "I'd have paid him $300," Gus added, with an air of affronted dignity, "but he only got me a C." Everybody laughed.   When Gus was made Tennessee State Safety Commissioner in 1982, I think I was as pleased as he was, and I wrote him a letter of congratulations, mentioning his well-known motto, "When in doubt, cheat. If caught, lie."Gus telephoned me, thanked me for the letter, then asked me why I didn't mention the second half. "What is the second half?" I asked. "If pursued, hide. If discovered, bribe," replied Gus. We both laughed.   For me, Gus was a trip. Even now, I can't help but smile when I think about him. Hopefully, Gus would be pleased that someone outside his family remembers him with affection on his birthday.         Best to all,         Delmar Lee Reynolds   Note: my thanks to David Parker for providing me with Gus's date of birth.  This would have been sent on June 5, but this writer expects to be in Chattanooga on that date. Lee Reynolds confederatesub@yahoo.com www.leeworks.addr.com